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The Guest List of My Wedding


Over a decade ago, I had seen a wonderful movie titled 'Love Breakup Zindagi'. It remains one of my favourites, despite the limited impact at the box office. It unfolds a not-so-complicated yet unique love story drama. The lead actors are invited to their best friend's wedding, a private celebration with a selected few. Starring Dia Mirza and Zayed Khan, this movie left a lasting impact on me due to its elegant storytelling, painting each character with vivid depth and creating an amazing blend. The movie isn't excessively dramatic, but it masterfully intertwines twists, romance, comedy and a mature happy ending. I've lost count of how many times I've watched it, yet each viewing reignites a positive feeling about the concept of weddings. After all, weddings are fun, marriages are hard.

See, wedding functions are a sacred affair. I don't believe in inviting acquaintances or family members I don't genuinely care about - And vice versa. And I would hate to waste money on uninterested strangers, in my life. I don't support lavish wedding celebrations, either, That money could be invested in travel, food, finances or other meaningful pursuits of mine. Why should everyone know about my marriage or intimate details when they might not show interest in other significant milestones? It seems unnecessary to feed a group who wouldn't remember my name on any ordinary day but are invited due to familial ties.  

Nevertheless, we often do things for our loved ones and wouldn't want to deprive our family of celebrating the union of two individuals and their families. With proper planning, weddings can be fun. And the guest list seems to be the most critical aspect of this endeavour, and I guess, I have cracked the code.

As I don't want to invite everyone to my wedding functions, I've devised a clever method to filter out unwanted guests for my special day. Naturally, I will have to discuss this with my partner to ensure his agreement and that he is happily on board.


Individuals must meet the following criteria to pass The Guest List Test 

1) Have I known them for more than 10 years? 

I have met countless people due to my extrovert nature, but not all are friends or well-wishers. Some people deserve to be part of my life as silent supporters, who haven't been vocal or physically present during my tough times, but checked on me and kept me in their prayers. They have seen my journey during different phases of life.

2) Do both of us love them?

Our decision to marry implies that our lives have intertwined, meeting significant people in each other's lives. Consequently, we have spent time with them and known them separately and as a couple. It's inevitable that my partner and I share the same sentiments when inviting them. It's our wedding, not our parents, siblings or grandparents. 

3) Do we see them in our life after 10 years?

Today, while we maintain polite connections with old school friends, business acquaintances, batch mates, college friends and extended family, not all merit a wedding invitation. If they aren't aware of our story (as a couple and as an individual)  or who we truly are, legacy invitations become burdensome. Hence, we would love to invite people who we want to involve in further adventures of life. 

4) Have they made any significant impact on our life/lives?

This criterion allows individuals who have been part of my life for less than 10 years to meet the above merits. Acknowledging my complexities, those who swiftly accepted me despite my quirks and flaws are welcomed by my partner and me. Bonds aren't always forged over a lifetime; some leave a lasting impression in a shorter time frame, and these individuals I see in my life after a decade. 

It goes without saying, one needs to get at 3/4 points to witness special days of my life. A wedding symbolizes a promise of a brighter future together, so it's vital to include those honestly happy about the new journey we will embark on. No unfamiliar faces or unfamiliarity -- Only friends and family who genuinely matter. Others will learn about my marriage, perhaps through social media or casual conversations. Also, I would highly recommend watching Love Breakup Zindagi, it's a feel-good movie perfect for curling up in your bed while sipping a cup of your favourite beverage.

Until next time, 

The Queen of Random Things 

xoxo







 

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