I Hope My Partner Is Nothing Like My Father

A father is a daughter's first love and nobody can replace this special bond. That's the reason it's believed that a daughter always looks for a reflection of his father in her partner, someone who can love her unmeasurably. I am no different. I have never loved another being as much as I love my father (Apart from me, of course!) However, he is completely the opposite of who I am today - Soft-spoken and utterly intelligent when it comes to financial matters. I have almost never envied my sibling because I know that I am his favourite kid. Plus, I have never been territorial with family. 

Growing up I have learned and picked up a few of his qualities that I admire. However, he is made out of a completely different clay so it is tough for me to fill his shoe and even become half of who he is. I have seen various versions of my father and I appreciate how he puts up with the madness of family. He cries the most among the four of us when there is an emotional scene on the screen and gets shit scared to face trivial things. It's amazing how love makes you accept a person with their quirks and celebrate it along with their normalities, isn't it, my dear reader? 

Nevertheless, when it comes to life partner I don't want to be with someone who is a carbon copy of my father. You know, you can't love when you are using your brain and you can't use your brain when you are loving. Ladies, we see our father through a daughter's eyes and he seems perfect to us because he keeps us happy and protects us from everything evil. There is no denying that nobody would value us as much as our father does and we will always remain "Daddy's little girl" no matter how old we get. 

But if we remove the glasses of daughterly love and see the real him we might see a different person. We set unrealistic expectations looking at our father because he treats us like a princess and thinks we deserve everything. As his daughter, we definitely deserve everything in the world and we get his inheritance without even asking. Thus, we expect our romantic partner to treat us like a queen, but we forget the fact that to be treated like a queen we have to earn that title and struggle with him to build an empire where we can rule with the life partner. A man can treat you like a queen if you make him a king and walk side by side through thick and thin. Isn't that right? 

The best way to measure if our fathers our perfect or not is to give him the benefit of the doubt to let him be human, instead of a perfect king(In our head). Don't go asking your mother if he is a perfect partner because you might get biased answers. Moreover, her image of an ideal partner will be different from yours (Call it the generation gap or experience). Once you look at your father from a human angle you will find imperfections and negatives. Many a time, we even ignore his shortcomings because of our love towards them and other times positives overshadow negatives. 

My father is a lot of things: emotional, big-hearted, giving, generous, smart and intelligent, tender. He has loved me unconditionally and accepted me even when the world rejected me. He has always stood strong behind me without making sound and he has ways to show his love and support. He is indeed a mind-blowing person and my hero. Yet a couple of months ago it dawned on me that he doesn't meet my requirements of an ideal life partner because I finally saw him as a human - Beyond just my father. He is fit to fulfil my ambitions, dreams, emotional and mental needs as a daughter but not as a life partner. This fact doesn't make him less of a person or me a bad daughter, it just allows me to know love for my father and have clarity about life partner. 

Thus, without any hesitation, I can say (An unpopular opinion), that I don't want my partner who is cut from the same cloth as my father. 

With that note, I will take your leave for a long weekend. Hope you have a good time. I will be back soon with an amazing blog. Until then chill and don't sweat.

The Queen of Random Things

xoxo