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What Do You Want From Life?

Recently someone asked me 'What do you want from life?' and I had no answer. I had to take some time to think and to be honest I still don't have an answer. No, I am not going through any existential crisis right now nor I am facing any midlife crisis because I am too young for it. While conversing about certain insecurities we stumbled upon this question. Since then, I have been curious to know about the purpose of life for everyone else. According to the Gujarati author, Dr. Nimit Oza, either 'Love' or 'Purpose' is the primary motive of life. I agree with what he says with a little twerk. I believe, we can either make love for someone else as our purpose for life or a meaningful purpose as our love in life. What a lovely wordplay some might say!

However, I am not yet clear about what I want from my life. Neither do I have love nor a purpose. I guess the only purpose I have every morning is the food I dream of before sleeping. I am a dreamer, but my dreams aren't about building a massive palace or making a billion dollars. Yet, no clear vision of an answer. If Lucifer fell on earth and stare into my soul with his dreamy eyes and ask, "What is it that you truly desire?" I think I would have no answer and he would be disappointed. It's funny, sometimes I cannot answer the simplest questions like this and it annoys me. Has it ever happened to you, my dear reader? 

You can rest assured, I got nothing on the journey of finding an answer. Although I realized I am scared of being irrelevant. I am scared of not upgrading my knowledge. I am scared of not knowing about the latest hit songs. It's not exactly Fear Of Missing Out but it's fear of not understanding things of the new world. I want to be related to the new world, I want to feel connected. It's like knowing about ChatGPT, having it on phone, but never using it. Hence, when there is a conversation about the subject I don't just sit like a couch potato, but I can actively participate. Also, I am a curious kid with a hint of gossiping nature. So when the West supports Selena Gomez, I want to know what did Hailey Bieber do this time to put her down. This information adds no value to the knowledge I gain, but it is consumed for the sheer satisfaction of my gossiping cells. Guilty pleasure, if you may!

And I am not sure if this is enough to live life. But it is working out for me. At this point in my life, having no desire means less drama, no anxiety or dissatisfaction and no unwanted competition with the world in an imaginative race. I am happy where I am, with a little bit of romance, lots of drama, no actions and a hint of suspense. I have enough!

Maybe someday I will have love in my life and a purpose that I can serve for the rest of my life. Till then, I know it is the food that I will wake up to. Either to cook or to explore. To more food that is yet to be tasted, places that are yet to be explored, people that are yet to be acquainted and knowledge that's yet to be learned. 


Until Next Time 

XOXO

The Queen of Random Things









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