Someone's Someone!

Nine years ago I had written a small article named 'Someone's someone. Somehow in broken English, I was able to pen down my thoughts and feelings. Moreover, when published it on social media my friends were able to relate to it which felt great. Today, after so many years when I read that blog I have 2 things in my mind. 

Number 1: What was up with my English??!! (I mean it was pathetic)

Number 2: Wow! I can still relate to it. (That was astonishing)

I have no idea how I stumble upon such topics and end up pouring my heart into them. But somehow I just do! So this blog is dedicated to the month of love!! Here we go.

You know I learnt at an early age that you can't impose your feelings on people. Trust me, people take time to understand it. People these days are afraid to be submissive one because they think they will lose control over relationships and themselves. Everyone is looking for a helping hand and all of us want an ear who can listen to us without being judged. 

But my question is, how many of us are lending an ear to listen? How many of us are being submissive in a relationship because the person is too important? How many are ready to listen to someone's rant to let the person free from their chamber of words? That too without judging!

Over the years, I have realized by observing that the world has lesser and lesser listeners. And trust me, we need more of them (And I would say Parsis too, totally unrelated to the topic!). I have seen many people having fear of being judged and keeping their feelings to themselves because of it. 

I am a terrible listener and I am sure many people around me will agree with that. It is a difficult battle for me to keep quiet and listen to someone with an open mind. But yes! I am trying hard to be a good listener and not just to argue back once they finish, but listen. The journey isn't easy, but I know it's worth the experience. 

On a recent date with someone, I decided to be an active listener and turns out the man is in his 30s and is happily single living with parents to take care of them and has this amazing zest for life. 

On a recent outing with a girlfriend, I got to know she is working hard to be in a relationship that she can never conquer and it's admirable to see her do that as I have always seen her as a little girl. 

A stranger found a soothing and non-judgemental secret keeper, in a coffee shop where I was writing this blog. A lovely lady in her 50s wanted to get married to her long-lost love of college with whom she reunited almost after 40 years. And she was excited about it like a 22-year-old. 

The journey became so much better that I was able to know my girlfriend's boyfriend better. And in the process, I realized he gets me better than anyone else because we have the same problem in expressing our feelings.

A lending year to my maid makes her day because she doesn't get that space often and in return, she gets me a bunch of chocolates as a gesture of gratitude. 

The world of listening has been an amazing change and honestly, I am still learning to be a better one! When it comes to being a great comforter I know I am not the best in the market but I am certainly someone you can count on! 

I remember one time a few years ago, one of my old girlfriends called me after years and wanted to talk to me because she wanted to separate from her husband. It was a complete surprise to me that she found a comforting friend in me as we weren't in touch. Another one was when an old friend decided to come out of the closet and tell me about his journey. These were a few great moments for me as a friend/ comforter/ well-wisher. 

I guess the world needs more listeners and comforters. Someone who doesn't need to have that desire or power to judge while being there for a friend or a dear one. I know it is a very difficult task and it's easier to judge people than to listen to them, but like Gandhi said, "An eye for an eye makes the world whole world blind". The desire to be heard and to be understood is so strong in people these days that psychologists and psychiatrists are making more money just to listen to people. I don't know if there is something wrong with our generation or the population of kind people have dramatically reduced. But yes! We need to be more kind to people. 

Everyone feels lonely at some point of time and they require support to lean. And I have decided to be one because I guess it's not too much. I know exactly how it feels when you have judgemental ears around you who are waiting for you to shut up so that they can counter an argument to prove you wrong or to make you feel bad.     

Cheers to the Month of Love!!!

The Queen of Random Things

XOXO!!